Remembering

Yesterday
I took it off
the shelf in my
bedroom
from its place
of honour.
I sat on the
floor
holding it tenderly
in my hands
remembering
the time I sat
outside the
city gates
dirty and broken
while you passed by
gathering
your skirts
so nothing
of you would
come in contact
with who I was.
I ran my finger
along its scars
remembering
how I sat across
from you gowned
and bejewelled
while your eyes
wandered the room
looking everywhere
but
into me.
I placed a kiss
upon it
remembering
when I was
an undesirable
amongst you
and how I curled around it
cradling it to me
while you kicked
dirt in my eyes.
It is one of
my treasures.
Has held
my blood and
tears and sometimes
even a small sliver
of dreams.
I wept over it
yesterday
remembering
and allowed the
anger to rise
knowing how you
wish for me
to carry it
again.
The storm of emotions
passed
I rose
remembering
the beauty of
who I am
returned it gently
to its place
on the shelf
remembering
my beggar’s bowl.

~Joss Burnel

 

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